Several months ago, my dad became a confused, mumbling soul all of a sudden. No tests came back with a clear answer, though it wasn't a stroke, even if it acted like one. Fast forward to now, and we find out that it was probably the very thing that took my nephew's mom, Sandy: sepsis, an infection. We were not told until recently. The difference was he was medicated early, and she only got to the hospital when it was too late to save her.
In the last week, my dad fell out of his chair, and it happened again. Dad became a mumbling, confused mess, incapable of holding a utensil. He's become less the dad we knew and more like a toddler, in need of intense care that my mom doesn't feel capable of offering. And no one knows why. They've eliminated one possible cause for his degenerating functionality after another. It turns out he had mini strokes, but they don't think that was the cause.
It's hard when someone who has been so important to you starts to fail. It's not easy to watch them lose themselves and become a stranger, scarcely able to hold a spoon, let alone a coherent conversation. It feels like a loss long before they actually leave, and so many complicated issues surround them. My grandma was like that for multiple years, sofa surfing and mumbling incoherently to herself long before we finally said goodbye. It's almost like you lose the same person twice. And I wouldn't wish that on anyone.
